Midsize Woman

If you’re a midsize woman stepping into a gym for the first time, you probably already have a goal in mind.

Maybe it’s to be skinny. Or to be healthy. Maybe it’s to finally feel good in your skin, wear that dress you’ve been avoiding, or prove something to yourself or to others.

Whatever your “why,” you’re not alone. Most of us start our fitness journeys with a single idea of what success looks like. But the deeper we go, the more we realize that fitness is not just a destination, it’s a transformation.

Today, I want to talk about two goals that many women start with and often transition between: being skinny and being strong. Especially for midsize women, the path between the two can be eye-opening.

Do you want to be skinny… or do you want to be strong?

My First Goal: To Be Skinny

When I started my fitness journey, I just wanted to be skinny. I weighed 64kg at a height of 149cm, and I had spent years hearing people comment on my size, family, classmates, even strangers.

Eventually, I hit my breaking point.

I committed to a strict diet. I started moving more, eating less, and focusing on the scale like it was my best friend and worst enemy. And I did it: I got down to 48kg.

For a while, I was ecstatic. The validation felt amazing, finally I could wear cute outfits without worrying about the size. I could blend in, feel attractive, and shut down the people who said I couldn’t change.

But here’s the truth no one told me: being skinny doesn’t automatically make you feel strong or even confident.

Does Skinny Equal Happiness?

At first, I felt unstoppable. Shopping was easier. Compliments came often. I felt more visible in the world. But inside, something was off.

My energy was low. I struggled to carry groceries, let alone enjoy an active lifestyle. I was afraid to eat more or lift weights, because I didn’t want to “ruin” my thinness. I looked good on the outside, but I didn’t feel good inside.

Eventually, I realized I was chasing a version of myself that looked delicate but felt weak.

And that’s when something in me shifted: I didn’t want to be skinny anymore.

I wanted to be strong.

The Shift Toward Strength

Choosing strength meant making peace with a truth I’d been avoiding: I needed to eat more. I needed to lift more. I needed to let go of the idea that the smallest version of me was the best version of me.

So, I changed my approach.

• I moved into a calorie surplus.
• I started a progressive strength training program.
• I focused on compound lifts, squats, deadlifts, rows and watched my form and confidence grow.

And yes, my body changed again. I gained some weight back. But this time, it wasn’t “fat” I feared, it was strength I was building. My thighs looked powerful. My arms had definition. I could move with ease, lift heavier each week, and hold myself tall.

This time, my body wasn’t shrinking, it was growing into its power.

Why Strong > Skinny for Midsize Women

Here’s why strength matters more than size, especially for midsize women:

Lean Muscle Boosts Your Metabolism (Even at Rest)

Many women think cardio is the best way to burn fat, but here’s the truth: muscle is metabolically active. That means the more lean muscle you have, the more calories you burn even when you’re doing nothing.

• A strong, muscular body requires more energy to maintain.
• This means you can eat more food without gaining fat and still feel fueled.
• Bonus: strength training also helps you burn calories after your workout is over (known as the afterburn effect or EPOC).

For midsize women who’ve spent years under-eating or over-cardio’ing, building muscle becomes a healing process: You get to eat, move, and thrive.

Stronger Joints and Bones = Long-Term Health Insurance

Strength training does more than shape your figure, it builds structural integrity. Lifting weights places positive stress on your bones, tendons, and ligaments, which signals your body to make them stronger.

This is especially important for:

• Preventing osteoporosis, a major risk for women as we age
• Reducing joint pain by strengthening the muscles around the knees, hips, shoulders, and spine
• Supporting your posture, gait, and daily movement so you can stay active into your 40s, 50s, and beyond

Strength isn’t just for now, it’s for your future self. It’s one of the best gifts you can give her.

Improved Posture and Visible Confidence

Strong women carry themselves differently, literally. Strength training enhances the muscles in your core, back, shoulders, and glutes, which are the very muscles that support good posture.

Here’s what happens:

• You walk taller.
• You stand more evenly on your feet.
• Your shoulders open up instead of rounding forward.
• You stop hiding and start taking up space.

Confidence doesn’t just come from how you look, it comes from how your body feels in space. Strength changes that. And people notice.

You Stop Fearing Food: You Start Fueling Performance

Skinny culture teaches us to fear food. Count calories. Avoid carbs. Stay small. But when you train for strength, everything shifts.

Suddenly, food isn’t the enemy, it’s your ally.

• Carbs become fuel for a strong workout.
• Protein becomes your recovery tool.
• Calories are energy, not guilt.

You eat to build instead of restrict. And that mental shift, from punishment to power is one of the most healing things you can do for your body image and relationship with food.

For midsize women who’ve been trapped in diet cycles, strength training is freedom.

It’s Sustainable. It’s Mental Health. It’s a Lifestyle.

Let’s be real: crash diets don’t last. Running yourself into the ground with HIIT and under 1,200 calories won’t either. But strength? It sticks.

Strength training is:

• Scalable (you can do it at any level, any size)
• Progress-based (you get better over time)
• Flexible (at home, gym, resistance bands, or barbell)

And perhaps most importantly, strength improves your mental health:

• It builds resilience and grit.
• It reduces symptoms of anxiety and depression.
• It gives you a focus that’s about growth, not guilt.

You don’t “fall off” strength the way you fall off diets, because strength training is about what your body can do, not just what it looks like.

You don’t have to choose between your mental health and your fitness goals. Strength gives you both.

Training to Be Strong: How to Start

Here’s how I shifted from skinny to strong, and how you can too:

Eat More (Smartly)

• Add 150–300 calories above your maintenance to support muscle growth.
• Focus on protein-rich meals: eggs, chicken, tofu, yogurt, protein shakes.
• Don’t fear carbs, they fuel your lifts.

Lift Heavier

• Start with 3–4 full-body strength sessions per week.
• Learn compound movements: squats, push-ups, deadlifts, rows, overhead presses.
• Track your progress by increasing reps or weights every few weeks.

Prioritize Recovery

• Sleep 7–9 hours a night.
• Don’t skip rest days, your muscles grow when you rest.

What Does Strength Actually Look Like?

It’s not about looking like a bodybuilder or lifting the heaviest barbell at the gym.

Strength looks like:

• Carrying all your groceries in one trip
• Walking up stairs without getting winded
• Feeling your glutes fire when you squat
• Lifting your toddler without back pain
• Catching yourself before you fall

Strong is functional. Strong is you, living your life better.

Final Thoughts

You don’t need to shrink to be worthy. You don’t need to chase skinny to be enough. As midsize women, we’re often taught that less of us is better but I believe more of us is powerful.

Strength gives you freedom, to eat with joy, to move without fear, to show up for yourself every day, confident, capable, and proud.

So ask yourself one more time: “Do you want to be skinny… or do you want to be strong?”.